-
Never
approach a bull from the front, a horse from the rear, or a
fool from any direction.
-
Don't squat
with your spurs on.
-
Don't judge
people by their relatives.
-
Behind every
successful rancher is a wife who works in town.
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When you
lose, don't lose the lesson.
-
Talk slowly,
think quickly.
-
Remember that
silence is sometimes the best answer.
-
Live a good,
honorable life. Then when you get older and think back,
you'll enjoy it a second time.
-
Don't
interfere with something that ain't botherin' you none.
-
Timing has a
lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.
-
It's better
to be a has-been that a never-was.
-
The easiest
way to eat crow is while it's still warm.
The colder it gets, the harder it is to swaller.
-
If you find
yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.
-
If it don't
seem like it's worth the effort, it probably ain't.
-
It don't take
a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.
-
Sometimes you
get and sometimes you get got.
-
The biggest
troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal
with watches you shave his face in the mirror every morning.
-
Never ask a
barber if you need a haircut.
-
If you get to
thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try
orderin' somebody else's dog around.
-
Don't worry
about bitin' off more'n you can chew; your mouth is
probably a whole lot bigger'n you think.
-
Always drink
upstream from the herd.
-
Generally,
you ain't learnin' nothing when your mouth's a-jawin'.
-
Tellin' a man
to git lost and makin' him do it are two entirely different
propositions.
-
If you're
ridin' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and
then to make sure it's still there with ya.
-
Good judgment
comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad
judgment.
-
When you give
a personal lesson in meanness to a critter or to a
person, don't be surprised if they learn their lesson.
-
When you're
throwin' your weight around, be ready to have
it thrown around by somebody else.
-
Lettin' the
cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it
back.
-
Always take a
good look at what you're about to eat. It's not so
important to know what it is, but it's sure crucial to know
what it was.
-
The quickest
way to double your money is to fold it over and
put it back into your pocket.
-
You can't
tell how good a man or a watermelon is 'til they get
thumped.
(Character shows up best when tested.)
-
Never miss a
good chance to shut up.
-
If lawyers
are disbarred and clergymen are defrocked, shouldn't
it follow that cowboys would be deranged?
